Quickly, I just want to say that it's been a month since I started working at Brookfield and that means I have to switch sections. I'll be going to Asia with the orangs, and will be leaving my beloved gorillas and monkeys behind. As requested, I'll try and put up a family tree of the gorillas, but it'll be a doozy all right.
In more pressing news, I've become a monster. I know, quite the inflammatory statement, but please, let me elaborate. I love animals. We all know it's true. Big and small, I'm a really big fan of all of 'em. Being the animal-lover that I am (mind you, that doesn't include making love, Ethan), I hate to see any unnecessary harm brought upon any animal (except for cows; they're just so damn delicious, but that's another story...). But during my employment at the zoo, I've done some things I'm not proud of, for the sake of my animals: I've become a mouse killer.
The first time, I wasn't my hand that directly killed the mouse, but I caught it and let it happen. But yesterday, after bopping a mouse reflexively, I had to put him out of his misery with the business end of a shovel. Like some twisted game of whack-a-mole, I brought my shovel down on his little head, killing him quickly, but ejecting his brains a good foot and a half from his head. Needless to say, I was a little traumatized.
On a completely unrelated note, I was walking to work this morning and passed the Riverside/ Brookfield High School as I usually do. Right in front of me was a gigantic horde of high school cheerleaders, probably getting ready to fail an IQ test or something. Being the courteous, dapper young gentlemen that I am, I say "Excuse me" as I pass, as in "Please make room, I'm trying to walk past your throng of bra-stuffing, lip-gloss-smacking ninnies." The response I got was "WHY? (LOLZ)" with a subscript of "Aren't I funny?"... Never in my life have I wanted more to call a girl (a young, emotionally-vulnerable one at that) fat. Proof that no matter how old you get, high school cheerleaders will harass you and give you no respect... Unless you're Zac Efron.
Well, I was thinking a lot, and I've decided that I'm going to try and transform this blog into a blog/ web comic, using the magic of [cue trumpets] THE INTERNET. This is because I like drawing, I want to get better at drawing, I think I have funny ideas, I like the internet [cue trumpets], and what better way to combine these things than with a web comic? So hopefully I can get some stuff done with my Wacom while I'm at home in the 'burbs this weekend, and have my first comic up on the internet [cue trumpets] by Monday's post. See how nicely that works out? Hopefully you'll like it and not throw rotten e-tomatoes at my e-face, which is conveniently located here:
Thanks for reading again, but the weekend awaits. PEACE
2 comments:
Back when I was thirteen and worked at a zoo I was given the opportunity to train a rat to climb a ladder and cross a bridge before they fed him to the python.
So I feel you pain.
this particular entry reminded me of a particularly drawn out debate between you and mitch on the morality of hunting.
Slightly different note on hindu culture: the cow? really? i mean you could have picked any animal to be sacred. pick a tiger. it's beautiful and hard to kill. the cow is bred to be milked, eaten, and tipped over by the bored children of farming communities. eat it for christ sakes.
There is many a cow in my current setting, and there are many debates on what cow is the best cow. traditional black and white? the ever popular "how now" brown cow? all black, all white, candy apple red, the list goes on. but i agree with willis. the best cow is the one being served medium well between two buns and being washed down by the milk shake whose dairy products were ironically provided by it. maybe a slice of american cheese. maybe a scoop of ice cream.
hooray for willis, who last time i checked continues to fight the good fight against lactose intolerance. your survivor story is an inspiration to us all. regrets to e baby, whose kosher kulture will continue to deny him the true beauty of the cow.
and yes, apparently i really need to start a blog. this response is out of control.
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